DAY OF THE LION

the light

2011-03-21T18:22:00.001-07:00

some stuff from a podcast (mosaic.org) i listened to at work this morning.

the language of Jesus transcends anything history has brought us.

God illuminates light through His voice.

Jesus connects life and light and makes them inseparable.

we want light to see in the dark but dont want light to be seen in the dark, it exposes sin, darkness, deceit. etc.

light will expel the darkness and you will find life.

God's intent is not to shame you but to cover and forgive you, not to expose you, or condem you, but that He can transform you.

the blood of Jesus purifies me from all sin

the more darkness you hide, the further you are from God

in the light there is LOVE! forgiveness, passion and life.

the place we are most exposed, is also the place we are most safe.

-erwin mcmanus

monday afternoon

2011-03-20T23:27:00.001-07:00

music: kings of convenience: weather: humidity 99%. location: work.

i feel you in the sunlight, the blue skies and green grass. i see you in people, i see you in me. why's it so hard in the city? with a full time job? i couldn't help but stare at a deaf couple so in love on the tube as i was on my way to heathrow airport. one of the most beautiful things i've ever seen. i loved the way they thanked each other; like they were blowing kisses. thank you Lord, for making all things beautiful in their time. thank you for afternoon naps, thank you for keeping me safe. thank you for the angels i don't see, but i choose to believe they're there. thank you for your power, is it in me? thank you for your forgiveness that covers my multitude of sin. thank you for believing in me. thank you for your love, that rescues me.

light/sound

2011-03-02T18:10:00.000-08:00

super cool light/sound installation from last night.

reminded me of me. brought inspiration back to my dry bones. gave me a million ideas if i ever wanted to celebrate something beautiful. (i know what i'm talking about ;)

love.

make up + grace potter.

2011-01-22T04:58:00.000-08:00

howdy. some dramatic asian bridal make up i did.

some sweet shadows that came in the mail for me today.

♥

new songs.

2010-11-21T18:58:00.000-08:00

it's been a while. hi! some things over the last couple months.

-moved country (now living in hong kong).

-changed job. (i'm a highschool art teacher)

-make up / photography jobs on the side

- livin with my WONDERFUL family

-no time for sleep.

-work six days a week. 5am starts everyday.

-speak french everytime i want to speak chinese. (what on earth goes on in my brain when that happens?).

-visited SCAD of hong kong which ruled

-hanging with friends i've not seen in ten years

-saw the NZ VS Australia rugby game which was way fun

-applying for more school as i type

-playing / writing new songs like this:

favourite passage from the bible this week:

Lèves toi ma chérie, ma toute belle, et suis moi. L'hiver est passé, les pluies sont bels et bien finies. Les fleurs apparaissent sur la terre, la saison des chants est arrivée

from song of songs...beautiful!

only cause you said so.

2010-10-04T07:03:00.000-07:00

really? i look like her?

dunno..no wonder i've had a crush on him all my life. har har harrrrrrrrrr.

♥

mymy.

2010-09-24T19:13:00.001-07:00

sick.

2010-08-29T00:06:00.000-07:00

...a few seconds before i threw up. GROSS. not been well for like, two weeks. suckage!!! :((

dork-a-lot. talking to my dear kelsey.

♥

body::shock.

2010-08-25T08:29:00.000-07:00

"she's in a culture shock. dealing with a different league of existence". (the conversation i'm hearing about me now -- i'd say that's pretty accurate).

so now i live in hong kong. i quit M.A.C for about a year (maybe - if it really sucks i'll go back to london sooner) now: highschool art teacher, and assisting english classes - literature and language. now: it's good to be using my degree's... now: moving from one of the most vain industry's into a totally conservative world; dude it's freakin hard!

before i left i did a little photoshoot of my friend laura. tons and tons of photos, but i've only got through a few since it all went down, here are a couple:

...now when the sun goes in,
i know your love has warmed me
but good God fix my heart;
it keeps breakin' in the dark.

don't you know you are my everything?

ps i'm crushin, maaajor, on this guy...

goodnight.

buddy miller.

2010-08-01T15:07:00.001-07:00

took the words right ouda my mouth.

♥

moccasssssin

2010-07-22T17:16:00.000-07:00

slack on expensive ups delivery... but i'm still waiting on these... its a third and fourth pair for me. love these suckers! writing this as i throw another pair or broken down toms in the bin. yoooooo.

He speaks

2010-07-19T11:39:00.000-07:00

yup.

ps can i live here alone next week?

♥

wowZA.

2010-07-17T14:42:00.000-07:00

psalm 34:5

"those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame".

its funny working in the cosmetic industry. the "imperfections" people come into store with asking me to hide. so much skin bleaching, skin dying, tanning, freckle hiding, tattoo covering, contour building, weight loss - such a huge deal. the amount of discussions that go on about shredding the pounds, or "i don't usually look this bad" when a customer approaches me. i hate all the complaining. i'm guilty of it. but, it upsets me, hugely actually. i've cried, even. ha.. doing a customers make up. perhaps it's just the older i'm getting the more i'm loving people for people. i've stopped judging imperfections like i used to when i was young. now i love a real person, and love people with real love. i love making grandma's feel like "movie stars" as one said today. i love when they come back just to see me again.

i love sitting on the tram heading back from work and seeing a italian man offer a stranger; a tired girl his jacket, or a lost grandpa asking me to help find his wife... and i love my neighbours. they were total strangers for weeks, then we bumped into each other across the garden. we shared a "hello" which turned into two hours just to find they've lived all over the globe also. the next week i came home, and my nieghbours were out again, she was heavily pregnant, and attending her garden. we stood in over grown grass talking. her husband came home, walked indoors soon came back out with a huge glass of orange juice for me and his wife. four weeks later we meet again, her child is born. i felt so excited giving them a card. i posted it through their letter box early one morning, but i don't even know their names. instead i just wrote "to my wonderful neighbours"...

a few days later we finally meet again. he has their baby in a sling and begins and shows her to me. he goes indoors and gets a knife and begins cutting veggies from his garden. "i cannot believe the succeed of my garden". i love his english. sweetest man i've ever seen. his face literally glows. hands me hundreds of peas, and leaves, then runs indoors and comes back out rice with fish "straight from a river in cambodia" that his moma has sent him. i love these actual expressions, and gestures of love.

this month i've been in california, atlanta georgia, new york, sheffield, leeds, wakefield, and soon to be in hong kong. transitioning is always a bit of a difficult thing for me. mentally and emotionally i have to become the bigger person otherwise i know i'd just fall apart. i've been doing it since thirteen - sorry if that sounds cocky.

georgia was great. a boy took me on an airplane ride at sunset. it was a plane from the 1930's. me him and a pilot. we barreled in the sky twice, i kinda squealed. i LOVED it. i've never wanted to be a pilot more.

california was very different for me this time - yea. i loved that my best american friend came down and saw me from vegas for the day, i loved hanging out with people i didn't hang out with much before. i loved seeing the johnny cash museum. this girl made me laugh so much. she's a beauty.

all that said, i love england so much. i love my country walks home. the amazing scenery, it's dream like. that's the only way to put it. train rides over the hills and far away. stretches of green grass, cows, sheep, birds, telephone wires, rainbows, sunsets, rivers, hills, tree houses. i absolutely love this country.

since i've been back a lot has gone on, a lot of hanging out is going on. i like it, it's like what life was like before you had internet on your phone - you know? real deal hang sesh.

i'm stoked on my new vans. got 'em in the sale. i've always wanted these ones too.

i'm soooo excited for this to come in the mail!!!!

i dunno man, if i can say anything is... celebrate your life. embrace the woman, or man in you. i know that sounds cheesy as hell but i've always wondered, 'when will be the age when i feel like i woman?' 'when will i be able to hold hands in public without being look at like, 'what're they doing, they're just kids' or, 'when can i wear what i want without being looking at me funny' or.... you know what i mean? there's no age... and if there is, i've never felt it more than i do now. there is so much peace.

later.

"...do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces." -matthew seven.six.

psalm 34:20
"He protects all his bones, not one of them will be broken"

2010-07-11T15:18:00.000-07:00

'there's a movement in my silence'.

♥

dear Jesus

2010-05-30T12:18:00.000-07:00

oh Lord i am so tired. do you think i work a lot? sometimes God, that seems to be all i do. i wish i could go to grandmas house and play guitar on her farm in the peace and quiet for a couple days. i feel you so much there. probably because she spends all her time talking to you, i know you are all over that place. thank you for being with her. i know she can feel alone.

i've been thinking about you a lot lately. how much you defend me, and love me. how much i depend on you, and where'd i'd be without you. i just can't imagine it, as much as i try, it just scares me before i get any further with my thoughts. my whole life is you, and i find it pretty difficult to desire anything else. besides you i have no good thing. every good and perfect gift comes from you. you set the stars in place and you call me by name. you give me butterflies over and over again. i love that your love never dies. thank you that you are constant and never failing. thanks that i can rely on you at all times. thanks for waking me up in the middle of the night just to hang out with you. thanks for telling me you miss me and mean it. thank you that your words are so powerful. thanks for knowing my worries and caring about the little things about me no one else knows. thank you for remembering my dreams and helping me accomplish them, even when i've forgotten. thanks for making me the way i am. thanks for giving me heart and feelings. thanks for your wisdom. thanks for helping me preserve myself. thanks for today. thanks for my future. thank you for my family. thanks for your anointing, that i seem to ask for so much. Lord i want you to shine on me, and i want me to shine on them. I want you so much. fill me up with all you are. please forgive me and wash me whiter than snow. there's so much bad i do, and i don't even know. thank you that you look at the heart and know everything about me. it's a relief to know you do that. lover you are mine and i am yours! please be in my sleeping, my every waking minute, my hesitating, my wondering, my flying, my working, my mind, my day dreams, my life. there's nothing more beautiful than you. you make me so happy. i ask for your joy, and your kindness, more of your patience. can't wait to see where you lead me. can't wait, and i can't stop thinking about how it'll be when i see your face next to my face. oh Lord you do so much more than exist. i'm so proud of who i love. inJn. amen.
-katy.

e x h a u s t e d .

howdy

2010-05-16T09:50:00.000-07:00

my stretched dislocated body...

and you'll find me laying here....

and here's a song by a great british band i love at the moment.

so much change is taking place. i'll spill the beans when appropriate.

-kates

MAY 5th

2010-05-05T07:07:00.000-07:00

and i'm still this cold? jeez louis.

<3

DORK

2010-05-03T14:54:00.001-07:00

what's up, i'm now 25!!!! this is my birthday picture, missing my REAL twin. seeya, wouldn't wanna be ya. aaaaah!!!!

so much is going on. can't keep up with myself. feel like my life is a ball someone threw miles ahead of me and i'm running trying to catch it up.

ok for real,
bye.

kidz

2010-04-25T15:17:00.000-07:00

can't stop watching these kids man.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bk_ysWNqpBc&feature=related

waiting

2010-03-29T15:27:00.000-07:00

for laundry has never been so fun.

heavy duty.

2010-03-28T14:38:00.000-07:00

I fell in love with Jesus all over again today. It was hardcore. I told him I wasn't going to leave until He spoke to me, and He did. He does every time I tell Him that. He's so romantic. He said only a couple things, but they were what I needed. He showed me the stripes in the sky and reminded me of the stripes He'd take for me, He drew me to the lines in the sky and said the lines He writes about me are as long as the lines in the sky, and after I paused, I looked in the sky to where the lines faded out and they didn't. It made my heart leap, and reminded me His love for us in endless and so rich.

People in my life come and go so much, it comes with my moving around and being a third cultured kid. It's in my blood, but the few friends that keep in touch and really invest in me seem to be my closest friends and stay with me forever. So leaving
one of the most romantic places I've found on earth today (the photo does NO justice - that picture is also SUPER zoomed in), was really difficult, it felt although I was leaving God behind. He had to assure me many times He was coming home with me. I was saying stupid things to Him like, 'I just want to take this place and jam pack it into my bedroom, don't leave me'. Yet it was me walking away, dude I mean, I was crying. I can't explain it. And when I got home, I noticed that the city lights I was watching, circled my house, (from a distance of course). I can't tell you how this place I found makes me feel. I was saying "God! I can't believe this place exists, it's beyond my wildest dreams". It really it. It's a little hill, but all you see is the city, it's dead quiet, all you hear are the birds, and when all the lights come on, it's absolutely breath-taking. It's better than the movies.

I felt although He thanked me for loving Him. I'm really protective with it, and I'm always called a big old "mystery" but nah, with Him it's amazing, He knows me before I speak. He tests my heart, and knows my love for Him is real. That my love is in Him, and all I am is devoted unto Him at this point in life, which is so important for me. I've had a crazy past two years. Tonight he also reminded me, but more - showed me, a few simple things I'd forgotten:

The more God - the more beauty you see. When I think I've seen the beauty of God, He impresses me, and turns over a whole new leaf of beauty unseen; it's although I'm given new eyes.

Also, the more time out with God, the more power He gives us to do His will. I want His anointing, His love for His people.

It was funny, I kept saying on top of this mountain over looking the city, while the sunset fell into it, "God I want you to be real to me, talk real to me". It was although He said "this is one of the most real experiences we've ever had" .It felt like we were entering a whole new world and He was assuring me He wasn't leaving me. It hit me in a way I can't articulate.

Other than all the talking --

My hair colour has changed. I was a hair model for TONI&GUY and they made it an awesome chocolate milky orangey brown. I've moved again - to a city called Sheffield. It's pretty, there's a ferris wheel in the middle of town.

The architecture it absolutely wonderful, the new team of M.A.C girls I work with are some of the prettiest people on earth. They're all total BABES. One of them discovered me on youtube, and it's been pretty funny hearing them say "it's just my style!". I've been signed up to audition for the TV show "XFACTOR - likes of pop idol - and that audition takes place in a couple weeks. Some girls who I've literally just met are taking the day off from work and are coming with me which I find mind blowing. They're going to dress me, do my make up and goodness knows what. It'll be funny. I'm jamming with a band this week, some dudes that are into my stuff that wanna play here and there. I'm going to be going to London A LOT! this month (April), my twin and I also turn 25 soon which I'm freakin' out about. Everyday, not kidding, I get told I look eighteen and I tell you, I sure feel it. Nothing's changed. I'm still as nuts as I was about Hello Kitty, ribbons, love, and whatever else.

Ohhhhh, and here's another song! :)

♥
-katy.

ryan adams 2

2010-03-11T15:17:00.001-08:00

"emotionally and mentally i'm in the worst place i've ever been in my life which is ironic because i feel very peaceful about it. but i have very very little to hold onto inside myself, and i see that very thin thread everyday".

wowza.

new song

2010-03-09T16:10:00.001-08:00

looks like my eyes are closed the entire time. they aren't. woke up one day with this.

♥

ryan adams

2010-03-07T13:48:00.001-08:00

borrowed mums ipod. had this song on. reminded me how amazing this dude can be. .... until he covers oasis songs. just kiiiiiidin.

numbers 6:24.

2010-03-05T15:22:00.000-08:00

Lord, make your face shine upon me. Turn your face toward me and give me your peace.

-numbers 6:24.

tonight it really bummed me out no one seemed to give a crap about the sunset. i'm talking about a WOW sunset. i might sound childish right now. but, that stuff blows my mind. i was surprised the whole street wasn't out of their homes watching it on the road with me. everyone was too busy watching the tv. ok back to journalling, and making a five minute video for the interview of my life soon. work is insane, i travel five hours a day to get there and back, i'm trying to move house, and working full time. go encourage somebody. it'll make you feel amazing, but make them feel like a million which is what they are; worth it.

love.

blown away!

2010-03-01T06:12:00.001-08:00

this article written about me made my eyes water! treasure!

Artist Portrait

Its is hard to say what is beauty truly is, is it a perfect sunny day? A face with perfect cheek bones, or a red rose? Some might say beauty is something that we have to look for, and others say it is hard to miss. When Katy Miller was asked what beauty was, she gave a simple, yet profound answer, “beauty is everywhere, its contagious.” Finding beauty in homeless people, and the sad and lonely, Katy tends to photograph subject matter that the average person might find repulsive or strange, and some how she captures the truth that lies behind. A fishing boat covered in old tires and bird droppings is made to look like an epic pirate ship, full of gold treasures and endless adventures. Capturing not only the photograph in an amazing frame, but also capturing the imagination, each begging you to wonder about the story being told and almost demands you to question the truth behind the photograph. Katy finds inspiration in the most ordinary subjects, people, and places, but also in time. She finds the fading memories of the 1940's and 50's screaming out to her, and demanding her attention, finding the era to hold a particular etiquette and a simple intensity that calls for attention. Creating art that transports you to another time and place, finding lighting that is unlike any other, and creates a space that you've never seen before, and yet, are constantly looking for. A photograph of the giant blue sky, and a field of grass frozen in time, almost simultaneously moves with the wind, as if it has a secret it is dying to tell you. Her art portrays these scenes effortlessly and each photograph stares back at you, challenging you to doubt its sincerity. Making that moment at dusk when the sunbeams hit perfectly last forever, when your taken away to that place where you know- life is an amazing gift. Her photographs speak to the heart and demands your soul to wake up, even if just a little, making you realize that life is full of beauty. Whether its a photograph, or an embroidered narrative, each piece shows love, and each piece causes a string of emotions. Growing up all over the world, Katy finds different cultures to be unique and full of experiences that we can not ignore. She finds different cultures to be an art in itself and finds incorporating that into her work natural, and almost inevitable. Katy Miller is an artist who creates beautiful art. She finds “beauty in surfaces of everyday people” and strives to portray a frame with the story worth being told. Katy creates art that comes to life and speaks for itself, its not timid or shy, but outspoken, bold, and absolutely beautiful.

♥

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

2010-02-26T01:57:00.000-08:00

cry baby

2010-02-03T16:51:00.000-08:00

yep thats me when i watched this .. amazing video.

http://vimeo.com/7715915

go! watch!!

few cute things.

2010-02-03T03:32:00.001-08:00

david bazan.

2010-02-02T15:39:00.001-08:00

ha, david bazan covered this song last night (originally written by julie doiran). made me cry. wish i wrote it. so simple but amazing.

♥

olive

2010-01-28T16:31:00.001-08:00

i need this outfit hah!!!

video.

2010-01-25T17:45:00.000-08:00

this made me tear up pretty good.

♥

thought you needed reminding.

2010-01-24T13:12:00.000-08:00

:)

♥

DIVINE APPOINTMENTS!

2010-01-19T12:04:00.000-08:00

there is so much good in silence. i’m not talking for hours, but those quiet moments in the day are so nourishing to me. in the car the other day i just wanted to drive to Jesus’ house and hang out so instead i just started writing whatever was on my tongue…

Lord, i’m sorry i constantly seem to stumble and fall, carrying on till it gets bad, burying myself in the thickness of it all. i don’t want to be stagnant and have self pity. i don’t want to desire what i hate. i don’t want to love what is not good, because you made good, and i love you.

will you pull me out of darkness? walk with me through the fire? to be refined, cleansed and pure, to be molded and shaped, to be a person you pleasantly decorate?

you give peace that sets treasures in my beating chest, building more than gold, Lord you give me your best. take away the man in me, the one i can’t stand to be. i want a child like spirit, O’Lord i can’t wait to hear it.

honestly, i’ve been a slacker recently. but the last few days i’ve just felt the fear of God so much which has totally kicked my ass (in a good way, not a ‘you’re getting whipped’ way). i desire to be at a even more! peaceful place where His anointing is. i want Him to make His home in me. so i’ve been reading again and talking a lot, journalling again and praying most of all.

last night i prayed for IMPENDING DOOM- i guess i just like praying for my friends and a couple are in that band, so i did and today was incredible. i’ve been thinking how as a sister in Christ i like to support, to do whatever i can, to fast and be there for whatever they’re going through (friends, family, the blind, whoever). so i thought, dang i need to pray for doom, that God just totally blesses their record to reach HIS people. today i was reading about impending doom on my phone, and thinking all those things and out of NOWHERE! this old lady says to me “I just have a deep sense of impending doom”. I just watered up and cried. haha. she doesn’t know anything about the band, she’s not a believer or anything. so that just kind of re confirmed to me i am possibly hearing the holy spirit and obeying Him. WOW! awesome huh. i LOVE it when GOD the creator of the ENTIRE WORLD uses me!!!

other than a lot of writing! i set up a paypal account and ordered my first thing of etsy.com! it’s an AIRPLANE pendant, and i seriously can’t wait for it to arrive. OF COURSE its from hong kong! haha.

LOVE.

lets end it all with a beautiful song sang by two of my favourite singers in the music biz. fo sho.

tights.

2009-12-29T02:26:00.000-08:00

for some reason, i'm really into tights. i've been buying tights on their own with nothing else. haha. i wear black ones to work but i need to find outfits for the others. these are ones that i'm searching for now! well, just one will do... but floral! oh and here's my new hair. it's a line. (that you can't tell from the photo).

if only we had anthropologie here!!!!

day off - still tired. two work days left before i leave my job. london tomorrow for new years! belgian and german hang outs!

♥

2009-12-14T15:10:00.000-08:00

todays been fun. ran around to different doctors, got sent to hospital, had an xray then jumped onto a train, headed to get my hair cut. they took off twelve inches and i'm stoked!

yeah, so here's a little doodle i had one the sewing machine! and then some other stuff i found and loved.

♥

2009-12-07T15:00:00.000-08:00

i was looking at these photographers earlier, and literally lost my breath. i can't get over how beautiful some of these photos are. if you're interested to see more, (which i think you should!) check them out here:
http://sloanphotographers.info

how absolutely gorgeous is this couple?!

other than that, a M.A.C make up artist that trains everyone in the north and works on celebs did my make up for fun the other day. i had to record that in a picture or two.

thank you topshop for my new three pairs of jeans. and thank you MAC for rinsing my wallet! spent £250 in the last two days. CRAZY! back to saving money for airfares instead.
PEACEEEE!

♥

finished!!

2009-11-30T13:50:00.000-08:00

now filling the pockets with little notes to lead to the bigger presents the advent calendar couldn't fit :)

ps! welcome my carmey to blogspot! she's amazing! :) http://lineyoureyes.blogspot.com/

2009-11-30T02:57:00.000-08:00

https://www.redvelvetart.com was shown to me by nicole (nicoleguthary.com) and on there is a DIY advent calendar. absolutely loved the idea and am trying to finish mine by today. i started last night after a loooong day at work and got a little ways. i'm filling mine with notes leading to gifts, this is for my friend wendy. we exchange packages and always try to out do each other.

and this, well, makes me smile a ton.

♥

november 28th, '09.

2009-11-28T15:21:00.000-08:00

today was insane at work, but i did feel appreciated by a little gesture. also a previous customer came in asking for me to make up her and her friend. working full time is awesome, but i feel although i don’t have enough time to do the artsy crafty things i’d love to be doing also. i spent my lunch time in a art shop buying a new sketch book, felt, paper etc. i’m making a few things at the moment and i’m beginning to feel like me again. aside from that, i moved to a new city and took a walk around and about and felt alive. here are some photos i took.

ps. i'm a huge sucker, i'm never gonna grow up. i love my new bed sheets.

all my love.

♥

life.

2009-11-25T12:07:00.000-08:00

so inspired lately. working on a couple projects. but for now i'm in love with ........

DEAR SANTA!!

AND ANYTHING AT ALLLLL TO DO WITH THIS MAN! AKA BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN!

♥

sup november!

2009-11-16T17:28:00.000-08:00

1:28AM, WAKEFIELD, UK.

yo! it’s my favourite month of the year. wanna get married under airplanes, crisp autumn air, bright blue skies, a golden sun, falling leaves, christmas tree lights? ok ok. my eyes are burning; how does this always happen to me. it’s ok, i’m glad i’m in life awake, rather than sleeping these days.

i won’t bore you with details, but lets say i was up for almost thirty hours, after a fourteen hour flight, exiting arrivals at the airport in london i was surprised by a friend with a bunch of flowers for me, they also took me out for dinner. i felt loved. after that i took a couple more trains, a five hour bus ride to leeds, then a taxi ride and walked into a new home for me. here i am, first sleep was last night. woke up at five for work and headed to ANOTHER new city to me called ‘birmingham’. went to ANOTHER M.A.C training event for christmas. christmas!!!! i bought lots of make up today, 60% off! gotta, comon’.

damage done!

first day wearing this new dress i like.

i plan to catch up on sleep tomorrow and figure out the transportation system here, unpack and do all those kinds of things. gosh i’m writing a lot huh? well crazy crap has been going on in my personal life. but lets just say God has shown me SO clearly the crap i’ve been avoiding on purpose. i want to give you the verse and the dream i was given but that would be complete violation of my soul as i’m in repair right now, but maybe one day. i woke up to the dream jumping out of my skin, and the verse - i think my iris’ grew ten times my normal size.

i don’t know if you dig country, but i listen to this song everyday.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6Zfx5qra_g

LOVEEEEEE!

♥

last week in HK.

2009-10-26T02:48:00.000-07:00

so bummed to be going in a few days, but a girls gotta get back to work and start saving the £ all over again. saving and budgeting is my new hobby. it's a relief to be debt free!

all my love! <33

waxing

2009-10-20T10:05:00.000-07:00

HURT today! ahemmmm. but yes, the lady waxing me burned me. apparently it’ll go down tomorrow or the next. i feel ugly!! :(

oh dear.

♥

sunday - eighteenth october, 09.

2009-10-18T08:07:00.000-07:00

katymiller.tumblr.com

asian snacks are the best!

my amazing new camera. guarding this thing with my life! now let me take photos of you :)

♥

october 15th 09.

2009-10-15T08:00:00.000-07:00

i want to be with you in the night. when i fall asleep you are there; pressing against my skin, as i breath in your air. when i wake you are still with me. i breathe me out, because i don’t like me, i like you. you are the only one i know. be my meditation, morning and evening. prepare me to see you, and search my heart. you hear me and you care for me. thank you for your patience, thank you for waiting on me. thank you that you passionately pursue me with your love.

“Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.” - revelation three verse twenty.

SO! today! baked some GOODS!

another interesting event, i went down to meet my mum at the gold coast - it’s a marina where boats dock, and its like an outside mall, i guess you could compare it to victoria gardens.. it’s just down from our place here… and anyway, on the way home we got into a taxi and this taxi driver for sure, had some personality goin’ on.

fish tanks on the back of the seats?! wild. i’ve never seen that before.

tonight we had bible study. it’s always so humbling. we open our home up to the refugees and eat and discuss together. mostly they’re all french speaking which is really fun, i enjoy speaking with them. they have been through more than you could imagine and have some incredible stories. mostly they’re separated from their families and children, don’t know where they are, dead or alive, and haven’t heard from them. they’re amazing prayer warriors and sing to the Lord with all their hearts. i sat and listened and watched them all evening. they’re such sincere people.

one of them was on the phone at the table for a long time and his friend threw him this. was funny.

i got given some hello kitty gifts! WIN!

oh, ran out of this today. bummed, and i don’t wana buy it here… cause with work back in england i get it for 65% off… this photos just me being bored.

goodnight from hong kong :)

<33

hey from hong kong.

2009-10-10T06:33:00.000-07:00

i'm getting worse and worse at this blogging thing. as if anyone cares? me. my journal sucks too, i am not keeping on top of things until the other night. i resurrected my journal picked up my bible and read a few really awesome verses that encouraged me. i thought to share. hope thats cool with you.

"in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight"

"the Lord disciplines those He loves."

"She is more profitable than silver, and yields better returns than gold. she is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. her ways are pleasant ways and all her paths are peace. she is a tree of life to hose who embrace her; those who lay hold of her will be blessed" - proverbs 3.14.

"every word of God is flawless; He is a shield to those who take refuge in him". -proverbs 30V5.

"Lord do not refuse me before I die, keep falsehood and lies far from me." - 30V6

it's amazing to me how the Lord just sometimes, literally plops things on your lap, yet you continue to argue how you don't hear from God, but i believe it's all in taking time out. i've been so busy lately and inside i feel like God has been distant, because i'm so busy. what an anticlimax hey? the second i take time out, He's there hanging out waiting patiently on me. what a man.

life is so good, i'm loving being around my family and talking to people i love. i've been running everyday, it's becoming easy. i remember when running was such hard work for me... now thirty minutes is becoming enjoyable. there are certain people in my life right now who brighten up my days beyond belief. they've been encouraging and so full of energy, life and drive. it's been inspiring and made me feel like i'm progressing and developing as an adult by talking and being around them.

my eyes are burning.

it's been a wonderfully busy day. it's my dad's birthday. if you know him i'm sure you love and respect him as much as me. he's so sincere, strong, smart, Godly, fun, super cool, and kind. gentle and wise. a friend and an amazing father. sometimes he's so generous to my friends and people around it makes me feel uncomfortable... but he always responds wth "God has blessed me, so i want to bless others. God gives me everything, so i give it away". i watched him today as he was texting thinking, wow, i'm so forturnate to have such an incredible dad.

hong kong heat is still here, in the 100's for sure, but thankfully humidity is getting less and less. i'm not complaining, i know england is freezing everyone to death right now - i might be going some where colder and not returning to the UK either :) i'll keep you posted.

i got handed a garth brooks cd today and pulled out a pair of my mum's country western cowboy boots. she's been wearing them all night. i showed off the best bit of line dancing that i know. hanging out with people from the south makes me happy and they're so determined to find me a southern man, yet i've never been so disinterested in a romantic relationship in my life. i'm so busy with other things. i was perhaps 'obsessed' with the idea of being with someone last year and it seems to have taken a one eighty degree turn on me. it's definitely peaceful for me to be so steadfast on it. those madly in love - i love you for it.

i'll post photos another time. i've got plenty, but for once i just wanted to talk to myself.

♥

katy.

mr wolf.

2009-09-25T20:02:00.000-07:00

i want these next!!

nail art.

2009-09-23T07:36:00.000-07:00

if you think fake nails are gross, "butt nasty", "skank" (in the words of my twin), don't look ahead, you might vomit. haha. i've never really looked into this till today. in asia nail art is huge, and a lot of people have it. i found some crazy stuff. i DO NOT! want it -- just for the record. i was just looking....

all i keep thinking is how heavy this must be. you must lose pieces to your nails all the time. haha. being a girl, man.
♥

moving keep on moving.

2009-09-18T14:22:00.001-07:00

see you in seven weeks england.

packed up a room, one day of work left, heading to london, did a vidal sassoon shoot that took all day, doing make up fora music video next month, met lots of new bearded tattooed friends. ha. i am loving Jesus.

in a bit blogger.

-katy.

stuff.

2009-09-10T05:58:00.000-07:00

some stuff that i found while browsing the other day. none of it belongs to me.

today.

2009-09-02T02:48:00.000-07:00

i grew a stash and just realised birds are in pretty much in all these photos. i like birds.

2009-08-26T10:44:00.001-07:00

Love give me the ability to speak things i've never said or thought before, to effect a person i've never thought to before.
Lord, you make the impossible, possible.
the rain woke me up and it reminded me of the day i asked you to kiss me
you told me how you would, and you delivered.
i love that you are God and you can do all things, i knew you could.
do you remember when i'd sit on that big rock in hawaii, writing you letters
and every night i'd walk home, with arms full of oranges that i found by the tennis courts!
i'm sorry sometimes it takes my small faith to see things in order to believe, forgive the humanity in me.
i love the way you love me and never leave me, when i wake you are still with me, when i fall asleep you are there;
pressing against my skin, as i breath in your air.
i breathe me out, because i don't like me, i like you.
you are the only one i know.
you forgive my sins and wash me by the well where i think back on the past that isn't going anywhere,
it doesn't dissolve, it's still here. i've learned a lot.
you are my relief, and you are my love.
I desire you, as you refresh me.
you are bigger and better than all things.
how do i give my life away? 'cause i think i have life to give.
i am your witness.

ps. i'm making a tumblr. it's been sitting there for five months, but its more complicated than this.
also, i'm really into the colour mustard at the moment.
i'm using film more than digital these days.
i'm going to hong kong soon and can't wait.
i still want my bow.
november followed by winter, can't come soon enough.
i'm shredding my fingers off writing new songs, i find peace there.

i love it when it rains.
♥

Psalm 23.

2009-08-20T16:05:00.001-07:00

A David Psalm

1-3 God, my shepherd! I don't need a thing.
You have bedded me down in lush meadows,
you find me quiet pools to drink from.
True to your word,
you let me catch my breath
and send me in the right direction.

4 Even when the way goes through
Death Valley,
I'm not afraid
when you walk at my side.
Your trusty shepherd's crook
makes me feel secure.

5 You serve me a six-course dinner
right in front of my enemies.
You revive my drooping head;
my cup brims with blessing.

6 Your beauty and love chase after me
every day of my life.
I'm back home in the house of God
for the rest of my life.

bazan.

2009-08-19T13:58:00.000-07:00

i love this guy, this song, his attitude, his words, and would love to see him play a third time. last time was at fuller, california, with some great friends. before that, in chicago. i miss america a lot.

2009-08-17T10:18:00.000-07:00

more pretty things.

2009-08-04T07:07:00.000-07:00

so much beautiful stuff out there. every-time i look i get overwhelmed. can't blame a girl for liking pretty things, comon.

i read that this couple collected leaves and other things for over a year.

i did this in my bedroom once. felt a little over powering though, but outside, different story i suppose.

glad other people are suckers for pretty birds.

crazy!

cute and intricate.

-katy.

black jag.

2009-07-26T16:28:00.000-07:00

so i went to school with vicky in belgium. known her for years. she's similar to me, moved all over the globe, family in belgium yet she lives in america. we were talking and she's all: "hey this is random but what animal best represents me?" so strange enough, we talked about it and i asked: "what about me?"

vicky - "a black jaguar because they're very rare and mysterious and independent, they're complex and highly intelligent and obviously they're extremely sleek and graceful."

do people usually ask this question? i've had the "what animal would you get tattooed on you" before. but not this one.. if i could choose, i'd be a lion of a dolphin. haha. it's way more interesting coming from someone else though. they have their reasons :)

SOooOoo.

what would you be???

♥

pretty things!

2009-07-24T05:26:00.000-07:00

my my, this afternoon i've been looking online at vintage sites, wedding sites etc. there is so much good stuff out there. i'm such an arts and crafts sucker, love stationary, stamps, and all that type of thing. so after looking over a hundred pages of things i had to say stop... these are some pictures of stuff i've either already done or will do and love!

love this junk. pen pals i'ma use this one on you next :)

i thought this was such a cute wedding invite!

wedding stuff i loved!

this is wayyy cute!

baby blue and brown together has always been a favourite for me. the flowers on top not so sure about, but its still adorable!

i guess since i use type writers and stamps a lot this was kinda fun. i know it's for save the date, but you could do it for anything.

these next few ideas i ADORE! and will definitely do. this blew my mind!

i've frozen photographs before for an art project... but flowers! dang!

and for some reason this stole my heart. i think it's absolutely delightful!

sigh. inspired! love it. can't wait to incorporate photographic film, photographs, tags and all types of stuff. i'm sure there will be plenty more in the next blog. these days off work are fun!

♥

blah.

2009-07-20T03:58:00.000-07:00

day off, yippie... looking for videos, i found a few i'd made in 07 on hong kong. i'll show the airplane video next. this is obviously a bunch of short clips put together to make you dizzy. music credit goes to copeland. enjoy!

and here's california... just cause i miss it a lot.

tired.

2009-07-15T03:33:00.000-07:00

"this is the first day of my life
i’m glad I didn’t die before I met you
but now I don’t care I could go anywhere with you
and I’d probably be happy.”

ashley came and left. hope saint louis appreciates her. generous girl.

i work hard. clean, journal, write letters, take photos when i'm not. i talk to Jesus all day everyday. i'm so worn out after i get home, cook and go to sleep. i like eight hours a night, if i get eight hours, i count myself lucky. today it was gloomy, rainy, cold and windy. quite a nice change.

mac events. freelancing. wedding party to make up on august first.
mac product update event today. lots of free make up. loved it. fastest passing day i've ever been in.

rebound girl X2.
ragdale spa for a pampering sesh with grandma. had my first facial. the body massage was weak.

missing a male figure in my life. aka. dad, brother.

rescued hello kitty from storage. i miss her sister. still have to find her.

shower. bed.
love.

june #2.

2009-06-23T12:47:00.001-07:00

i got a call- i ended up getting the M.A.C job - i'm tired of talking about it. now applying to work at VANS also. just cause, i love vans. i've had an amazing couple days hanging out with my friend sarah. i got back this morning. i was thinking about people i really like and wondering what i find so admirable about them. i laughed a lot yesterday, it hurt. i also went to an art show. didn't like that much, but what i did like, i enjoyed.

i press flowers, and like the idea of preserving things that are beautiful and fragile, and how they relate to us personally. this dress was crafted together with petals.

and sarah took me into a dark closet and said "you'll probably love this"... and she was right... hanging flowers that had been soaked in PVA glue - another favoruite thing i love to do. PVA makes crap look so much better. ha. man it reeked in there though!

today i met up with a friend from scotland who i've not seen in a year (probably read this at some point huh... since you asked about my blog today..). had a couple meetings today also... busy days... tomorrow i'm taking the train to hang out with some babies, then grocery shop, house clean, and cellgroup at my house.

i'm feeling super close to God and it's completing me in so many ways. especially after "feeling" not much for so long, but being diligent as much as possible regardless. i have His assurance and i've been talking to friends about the fear of Him a lot lately... like even when you enter heaven, it takes preparation and cleansing to see Him because he is just that awesome, and majestic. awesome - that word should probably be used less by me for everyday things, and used when i talk about His sovereignty. i like the way He renews me, and teaches me things privately, and personally... incredibly intimately.... in a way i can understand.... sometimes :) album leaf is seriously putting me to sleep at nine forty this evening. it's still so bright out, i love these days. bath time, with the windows wide open.

ps- suuuupa bummed doom aren't coming here anymore. european labels need to get their junk together!

lately.

2009-06-18T03:05:00.000-07:00

hello hello. i usually have the tendency to blog late at night, or when i'm emotional and i've made myself stop doing that because i can write things way worse than they are. so here we go, it's noon on the dot, i've been awake a couple hours, sitting here drinking lemon and ginger tea watching videos on youtube of my girl. it's my favourite movie ever, and well, here enjoy a couple minutes:

so my last M.A.C interview, i came home made ramen noodles for lunch and heard God so clearly say "i have better for you" as i was hovering over the hot hub. i remember saying outloud "i am not hearing this right now". so ever since the last interview i've kind of tried to forget about it, and figured that job isn't for me. it tiring hearing that after four interviews, and if i'd heard it earlier then i wouldn't have bothered or tried so hard... but then again perhaps doubted what i was hearing. for the record- i'm supposed to hear back this week, they've got two days left, and as it looks, seems highly unlikely i've got the position. i'm honestly worn out and tired. my energy is minimal! yesterday i phoned them asking when i'd hear back and they said they'd let me know through the mail. probably another letter saying sorry. so i cried a lot, emailed my dad, forgot to eat all day, and worked out for two and a half hours but i'm all better now. the waiting period can just be so hard, especially when it feels although it's dragging. your destiny and purpose gets all confused and seems to spiral downwards really fast... it was funny, i stumbled on a tithemi podcast on destiny out of no where, and it encouraged me.

so here's a couple babies i wanna show you. levi and and eden joy. i loved cuddling them for hours the other day. eden joy is ten weeks old, and the most peaceful baby i've ever held. she's great. and levi, what a dude. his eyes are intense.

i've been taking lots of polaroid photos lately. i've been borrowing an awesome polariod camera, crazy flash on it and everything. i got my typewriter back the other day, so i've definitely been using that too.

...and finally :) this song is pretty much word for word my life right now. it has been on repeat till i fall asleep at night, literally. i hope you are all doing amazing!

♥

june o'nine.

2009-06-06T18:07:00.000-07:00

He delights in me.
to Him, i'm as bright as the moon.
He told me. under a tree, in a deserted park the other night.

then a man came chasing toward me asking me for my number, after a bit of a chat and telling him i didn't have my phone, or know my number (ahem!) eventually he carried on running as i walked the other way out. i've been to a chicken place here, and didn't end up paying for my food, the chef; a guy there wants to take me to his homeland. his friend walked in and was dark skinned with the brightest ocean eyes, so i mentioned it. they barely spoke english so they thought i was talking about the drugs he was on and how i could see it in his eyes. yeah, then i got offered to go smoke, but no. this guy ended up finding me in this same park a few days later, asking me if i had a boyfriend. thankfully my phone rang and he said "i'll be back in two minutes", he turned around and i ran home for dear life.

i just walked back in the door from hanging in london. i just decided to go see my friend jordan visiting from california who goes back to CA tuesday, also wanted to see anna for breakfast, and say hey to my big brother. was an eventful couple days, and i loved it. i bumped into my friend jeff in the middle of london (which is crazy, cause it's huge), and that was super nice to catch up and get coffee.

myself & anna.

looking at awesome art with jordan.

there was plenty i liked, but i particularly liked these because i love portraiture.

it's my last demonstration with m.a.cosmetics on monday, i've been waiting so long and there are so many interviews for this position it's beginning to seem rather tedious. i care as much still, but at the same time, i know what i'm capable of and if i don't get it the job it's not the end of the world, but i really do want it.

i hope you're all doing well. i like how in random emails or conversation people mention how they've been keeping up to date with me on here, when really i think no one ever reads it and wonder why i even bother. but it's good to know from time to time someone does.

oh, bangs.

-katy.

:D

2009-05-23T06:43:00.000-07:00

my twin brother is so awesome!!! i can't wait to get these in the mail. i'm crazy about these watches and look how many he got me. oh dang! i have a pink one i love already. i ruined the surprise cause... twins... we know each others brains... oh he's the best. hong kong is SO good for stuff like that. i miss it.

other than that! i had my second M.A.C interview that went so much better than i could have ever imagined. she said my portfolio's was one of the best she's ever seen - and that it made her wonder why she's not done what i have. also, she asked me how i felt about a manager roll - that just blew my mind. she said she couldn't help but mention how good i looked. i mean what? this is crazy! but i'll always remember, the first thing she said to me was "i love your nails" so, heres a crazy photo.

back to M.A.C - i should be going up for the third demonstration - she said over 18 applicants have gone through just in one day, and now it's down to five, then if i win i get sent away to another city and get trained and stuff under M.A.C, you've no idea how badly i want it! really would be a dream out of three major ones come true. i've had such encouraging things sent to me about it through the mail - such a surprise from friends. i guess they know how long in line i've been waiting for this opportunity:

so i'm taking a model and doing her up in front of a bunch of "judges", and i want to win... but so does everyone else. i'm just going to do my best and see what happens. the manager gave me a lovely hug goodbye, and i will be in to see her soon to talk about the "look" i'm going to do!

HIS LOVE! IS MORE FAITHFUL THAT THE MORNING! - the one line by phil wickham i can't seem to get out of my head at all. last night i hung out with triplets! it confused me so much, but was so warming. they were all crazy and looked the same, how amazing creation and the human body is! wonderful!

to end today, it'd be perfect to be in hong kong swimming in the pool at midnight drinking lemon tea. alas! i'm here. back to REALITY! i'll talk a walk on some green grass instead. bye friends! ♥

ps- i cant freaking wait for impending doom to get hre. :)

♥

sick.

2009-05-20T02:31:00.000-07:00

i'm the sickest i've been in so long - body aches, fever, constant headache, nose, the HEAVIEST eyes, you know the drill. so not fun but hey. it is what it is. i wonder why soup is so good when sick... i dont know but it is, probably the only thing i can taste, and it's super hot - the way i make it :) i have a second M.A.C (cosmetics) interview on friday which i'm way stoked about. it's one of my dream jobs, so if you could say a prayer or two to help me, that'd be awesome. i've a feeling i won't get it... but we will see. i've been singing lots of johnny cash today, and love it. i got bangs dyed it back to black.. here's my sweet $5 wallgreens CA tshirt!

i've got a few more images to edit for my portfolio so i'm off to do that, but hope you're having a wonderful day, wherever it is you are! all my love - katy.

♥

distance.

2009-05-10T18:10:00.001-07:00

england is being pretty.

When I receive his love I become free
When I give him love, I become alive
Help me start afresh, I want to trust you with my life.
Move mountains, because I cant.
I dont like the thoughts in my head, or the words off my mouth,
I don't like being so dirty, so unclean,
I dont like feeling this distant, but I've never felt so distant before.
I dont want to lose your anointing, I don't want to lose it all.

My heart doesn't work without you.

life, is this right now. i'm no entertainment. thrash and burn tour coming up, guest passes thanks to kristin and ryan. life is transforming and re shaping. it's interesting. i'm growing up. i'm a year older and amazed i still use the same organs and heart as i did at 1 day old. take Him seirously otherwise what on earth are we doing.

surprise flowers....

i dont like that love and curse come off the same tongue. it's been hard having so much fun from people that don't love the things i love; it's stolen my attention lately. other than that; pen pals, get those pens rolling, i now have an address, for this month at least.

grace.
♥

wakey shakey.

2009-04-20T05:45:00.000-07:00

so hanging at amy's for a little bit. she lives in wakefield, the accent here is super strong. i've told her we're going to make a video just so you guys can hear it. i went to art college in this city. i've been travelling like crazy and i'm really looking forward to stopping. hong kong to london, to brussels, to london, up to the coast, back to london now up north. i've got tons and tons of photos to show for it, but as if i'm going to blog them all! but, heres a few.

it's my birthday tomorrow.
♥

traffic sucks.

2009-04-09T00:06:00.000-07:00

landed back in london a few days ago, headed to grandmas. interesting time there this time. now in the car driving to london to catch a flight to belgium, can't wait, though i'm gonna miss my twin. he's hanging out in london with my big brother. he's napping next to me, cute. belgium will be good though, it rules! looking forward to seeing some old friends. i've never blogged from my phone before it'll be interesting to see on the web :) listened to appleseed, album leaf and finally the format are waking me up. i took some photos at 5.30am... let me see if I can upload them somehow.. its being lame and not letting me. i'll post photos when i get back to a solid internet. LOVE LOVE LOVE! its harder than judging, i dare you to try it with me!

katy.

dang.

2009-03-31T09:35:00.001-07:00

please win american idol. thanks.

♥

weekend.

2009-03-27T09:47:00.000-07:00

is already crazy! surprise birthday parties, tea time, rugby games. yeah.

rugby for three days. AWESOMENESSSSS! box seats.

an american grandma in her hong kong americanized home

♥

life.

2009-03-25T21:23:00.000-07:00

the other day i was totally in the dumps. bible and prayer walked. was just annoyed and couldn't even pray or read without being distracted or frustrated. gave up on it. scribbled a lot, here's a bit:

i want a light to ignite me. if ever i have anything in my body to set fire to.
consume mind, consume soul, consume whatever will make me whole.
set me free and help me believe, this life was meant for me.
i'm breathing me out to breath you in, cause you alone are the only one i'm hoping in.
set me ablaze, set me ablaze, set me ablaze.
help me remain true, remain committed unto you.
i want to meet you and know you, not to pretend like i do.
be my desire when i am desire-less,
may you create me desirable even when i feel completely miserable

cooked dinner and cried, then felt all right, head to bed and woke up like it really was a new day. an old friend and i talked [divine encounter]... an amazing person i completely look up to, and was encouraged beyond anything. my stomach hurt from laughing so hard, so did my face. i like highs and low low's in life. it's all part of the plan. i don't hide anything. praise him in it all, right. lately:

too much of this. i've had like three video chat sesh's a day. haha. i love it. it's been fun.

the last photo before my camera completely died. sadly its out of focus, this girl is adorable. her name is tiffany! i cuddled this other three month old baby that same day and got puked on. it ruled. haha. it was a down pour of puke. jeans, tshirt and everything.

hanging in rami's jag, you know...

rugby sevens this weekend. i have a VIP pass in a corporate box thanks to rami, that'll be interesting. i've never had one of those before. it's free for me, i'll take it! other than that i've been playing a whole lot of guitar, there's a misery signals show coming up, and then i fly out a week saturday back to europe.

adios.
♥

moments like that. yeah.

2009-03-20T09:48:00.000-07:00

well i'll never forget the first time that i heard that pretty mouth say that dirty word
and i can't even remember now, what she backed my truck into
but she covered her mouth and her face got red, and she just looked so darn cute that i couldn't even act like i was mad.
that's like just last year on my birthday she lost all track of time and burnt the cake, and every smoke detector in the house was going off she was just about to cry until i took her in my arms and i tried not to let her see me laugh. i know she's not perfect but she tries so hard for me and I thank God that she isn't cause how boring would that be? it's the little imperfections it's the sudden change of plans, when she misreads the directions and we're lost but holding hands. when she's laying on my shoulder, on the sofa in the dark, and about the time she falls asleep, so does my right arm, and i want so bad to move it because it's tingling and it's numb, she looks so much like an angel that i don't want to wake her up. when she steals my heart again and doesn't even know it, yeah i live for little moments like that.

-brad paisley.

make up dork.

2009-03-18T04:53:00.000-07:00

happy birthday to big brother james, and happy birthday to carynnieee! james is snowboarding in france, and hurt his knee :[ hopefully he recovers soon to finish his holiday nicely! i'm craving the snow and boarding so badly at the moment, it sucks!

today i spent hours looking through malls, here they are big and have lots of stores, all kinds of outlets but i'm kinda burnt on buying new stuff and have been for a while, i enjoy saving my money for airplane tickets... but i do have a weakness for make up and accessories. it was brought to my attention i need more "professional wear" - so i've been trying to think out the box on what to wear to higher up jobs and things now. it's hard! i'm such a nineteen year old stuck in a twenty three year old body.

i'm not gonna show you all the little nick nacks i've bought in this wonderful city - but today i bought anna sui eye shadow.

i was so struck by how pretty the store was and thought i couldn't possibly afford anything in there... but i've had a hard time finding red red eyeshadow. mac doesn't do a strong enough pigment, neither did shu uemura (but i bought eyelashes there today! and they complimented me on my eye shadow haha - always a good thing coming from another make up artist), so when i saw anna sui had it i had to buy it! the packaging is so beautiful so it was worth it! yeah, i get told all the time i'm a "visual" person, and i guess i do like pretty things. ha.

mac has launched their hello kitty line - too bad i don't dig any of the stuff so much. it's just got hello kitty on, but it's just like the rest! ok maybe i can't talk since i don't use it, but it's way cute and perhaps i should buy a compact just to remember it. haha. i'm such a dork. but yeah, ask jennah if you're interested, i know she likes it and bought some HK stuff.

here's some more photos of hong kong markets - this is the rougher, poorer sides of hong kong, there's a big distinct difference between rich and poor hong kong. so don't think it's all the same, and like this.

central:

a dumpster i found in the middle of the night:

bus ride home:

zzz time listening to sufjan stevens.

♥

dog?!

2009-03-14T06:33:00.000-07:00

so not stoked on the look of this blog right now. everything looks way crappy. the colours hurt my eyes or look like poop. why did i change anything at all. makes me consider switching to tumblr. say whaaat. i had a very good day. bought a new rugby jersey. i might be getting a dog and i'm very excited. i day dream about the canon 5D mark II. soon travels will begin to london, belgium, california and back to hong kong. that's all for now, seeya later alligator.

peeacee.

divine romance.

2009-03-13T02:17:00.000-07:00

i'm watching a bird that's come to hang out with me on the porch. i just finished learning divine romance by phil wickham, love that song. it used to make me cry everytime i heard it, i'm okay listening to it now though. be blessed by it!:

i've been thinking//talking lately how i'd love to lead//do worship forever. my body and spirit just feels so right when i do, i love it. i led last night with a group of refugees and i was all smiles listening to them sing with their courageous voices. i'm leading worship at union church here in hong kong next week, i'm excited about it, such an honour. i'm cosy with the AC blasting to cool me down from a steamy walk with pete. we bought japanese ice cream and i accidently dropped it and trod on it; there was no saving it for me. i was bummed, just like a little kid.

i guess these kinds of letters make it worth it:

Mar 13, 2009 5:39 AM
Subject:
Hi
Body:

Hi,

you don't know me but I have something to say. I know this could sounds weird but... anyway.

When I'm feeling bad or sad sometimes I just come over your myspace or blog to read your texts and see your pics and it makes me feel better.

I thought that I've to tell you that and thank you for being what you are.

You don't have to answer. This is just something that I wanted to tell you for while.

Keep up the good work !

------.

PS: Sorry for my english, I hope this is not full of mistakes
♥

dear charlotte, nc.

2009-03-05T00:14:00.000-08:00

as i think of you with lots of love
my eyes start to hurt
i've kept you a secret for so long,
taming the heart and soul of what i believe i really feel
i'm like a fool;
though each new day brings something to fuel the fire in my heart i'm trying to blow out.
quietly in the dark my dreams of you are caught between the stars and lost in your ocean eyes
waiting for thunder to capsize this basket of endless thoughts tossing upon the waves.
her tears like a leaking fosset waiting at the well collecting anything real to quench her thirst
my heart starts to hurt
i no longer want to compare love to another i'll never find.
instead i'll feed the birds with the rest of the words i've left to say,
expecting the wind to fly them back to san fransisco bay.

O'Lord gve me something new to say; wipe all love for him away.
O'Lord give me something new to sing; someone worth hoping in.

i miss my type writer.

♥

blergh.

2009-03-01T02:58:00.000-08:00

my mood has sucked for days. can't get out.

i joined twitter for the third time. hopefully i won't feel compelled to quit again. add me if you like, i'm not sure how it works. i won't quit on you this time: acrossthesea is me. lets be twits. hahaha. okay bye.

♥

wax.

2009-02-26T18:40:00.000-08:00

everything is in chinese on my mac, i kind of have to guess where "new post" and things are. my yahoo turns into chinese too. i just had a chinese pear, they are so good, try one if you can. i feel violated after having my hair ripped out of my body. i had a waxing experience for the first time. didn't hurt at all really, which i was surprised about... but i do just want to go straight to laser hair removal. my sister and i had a pedicure, the most luxurious one i've had. we had the best afternoon and i loved every second of it. it feels good to be pampered! yesterday i walked down to the water by our house which was good for me, i enjoyed silently reflecting on Him in a new environment.

♥

take two.

2009-02-24T06:52:00.000-08:00

location: hong kong
listening: acceptance
time: 22:57.

tuesday night. i am so tired. wondered around hong kong island for the first time since i've been back. bought an expensive bag i'm still talking to God about. don't know if it was a dumb move or not. got an awesome watch, a hello kitty hair accessory- cost ten hk dollars. (us 20 cents), justified. i can't buy any more hello kitty for my life, really it's out of control. alysa reminded me in an email today its our birthday in two months, crazy how we all grow up. it's cool how i know four people that share the same birthday as me. i saw lots of lovely hello kitty gear for bayley but didn't do it. today i've been wondering why i'm alive, i know to have relationship, but i wonder what He's got for me sometimes, and i hope i'm walking in the right direction, and if i'm not, i hope i'm quiet enough to hear His guidance. i'm genuinely happy again for the first time in about a year, it's taken a long time and i've waited on it for what felt like forever. i got frustrated because i couldn't force myself to feel a certain way and didn't understand why it wasn't coming, but now it's here, it feels thorough and most real. i'm rationing photos to blog. i take many photographs.

the beginning.

wigs anyone..

twins are forever.

♥

23:15.

make up.

2009-02-23T05:00:00.000-08:00

location: hong kong
time: 21.15.
listening: ceiling fans.

man i am laughing a lot being here. i've learned how much i enjoy cleaning. i know - not too conventional, but i enjoy it. today pete and i hung out which was so nice, quality time with the twin never gets old. he bought fish balls on the way home, they are so good, i had seafood animal crackers and lemon tea (bet you're thinking it sounds gnarly, but don't knock it till you try it!). walks home here are nice cause it's so safe and we live by the water. i forgot to bring my camera, otherwise i'd show you.

a girl, on a model website i'm a part of (for make up), stole a photo of a someone i'd worked on and edited it some:

the need and want for a job and a career is bursting in my heart [anxiety], i know i have to get on with it...really get out there... i guess everything requires money whether its for more plane tickets, camera gear etc, or straight up survival. few people are forwarding me numbers of places to call to help me, i just need to grow some -- and do it. i hate talking on the phone to strangers, i just hate it. anyone that knows me probably remembers a time or two i've hung up on someone because i get irritated and patience wears thin ... and i cant be bothered. it's not cool, i guess it's quite rude. siggh, something i gotta work on.

21:24.

adiosss!

♥

hong kong.

2009-02-21T06:33:00.000-08:00

location: hong kong.
time: not sure, somewhere around 11pm.
listening: my dad shredding and the tv.

i've been in hong kong just over twenty four hours now. it rules here, i love it so much. home sweet home after almost three years. i cant believe this was where i was born and raised sometimes, what a blessing. my parents new home is beautiful, they did a good job. spanish villa by the sea. it's been busy since i got here, had a nice lunch date with friends today, dinner last night by the water with my parents etc. i should have a good night sleep tonight. didn't sleep much last night, 3-6am i was wide awake listening to my american heart on repeat. jet lag should be my second name, but i did start things on the right foot with nestea. best lemon tea ever.

peace.

ps: i've decided. i'm gonna get orange hair while i'm here. prepare.

♥

happy birthday and sexy time?

2009-02-18T15:35:00.000-08:00

location: kingston upon thames, london
time: 12:03 AM
listening: social siberia.

it's nicole's birthday today. happy birthday! cleaning out my awesome hello kitty wallet, i was ripping up receipts and accidently managed this. dang. ripped up photos of her and i from burbank days.

it's been eventful lately! grandmas six day hang out time was awesome. she's got the most comforting farm house that's been around for years with lots of land around, up a long drive. so relaxing. such a beautiful place. i don't want to do anything when i am there. we did many worth while things, including: prayer, poetry, laughter, singing, dancing, crying, story telling, dvd watching, flower talkin etc. she is so sincere, she told me that's the only way we should be. she told me to stay "crush free". i laughed and told her she was too right. she's all about love. her fiancee was shot around my age. i read love letters from the forties, makes me relieved i've kept mine and didn't make a mistake to throw them out. she's so together. she can drive real well. we are blessed by each other and definitely expressed that. we took lots of photos. she's hilarious and i got some really funny photos of her in my sunglasses. haha. i'm protective over my family and would show you if i didn't see my photos on random people's myspaces.

sexy time?

after three train rides i hung out with friends. i got my ipod updated by simon. very nice. i'm officially pop punked. i'm excited to have a new selection of songs for my thirteen hour flight tomorrow. i got home to a package. i'm nuts about snail mail so i was pretty stoked. i open it and it was all sex stuff. condoms and things i'd never seen before. it was hilarious and i died laughing on my own, to myself for many minutes. then i proceed to read a letter "please ignore this if you aren't sexually active". funny times for katy miller. it's amazing how england looks out for us though. i appreciated it all at the same time. but yeah, hit me up if you need any condoms. okay, just kidding. not getting crude here.

i played guitar for hours today. many hours. i wrote a lyric i like. the bank didnt help me. what else. i had a good long conversation with a friend on tour. i love when people drive through the night, because that's day time for me while everyone else is asleep. that means much talk all for me.

i'm going home tomorrow to hong kong. cannot wait. it's been almost three years.

my eyes are tired. seeya.
♥

12.17am.

forever // sick.

2009-02-11T04:17:00.000-08:00

lately i've been sick. sick. sick.

recovering from a californian hot tub incident using antibiotic cream:

then out of no where i started to experience the must excruciating pain in my mouth; wisdom tooth. so i registered over the phone with a dentist and booked an app. found the place today thanks to my google phone. i was impressed with the gps on it for sure. it was beautiful walking through parks, wandering over frozen over lakes and through back cottages to find the dentist. outcome: more antibiotics.

and they suggested i also take this:

when really i just want to be on this:

it's just not the right time with my current state.

anyway, last night lighted up my life some. i went to see forever the sickest kids, again. yeah, i'm a huge sucker for pop punk, southerner's, and red heads,(prettiest boy ever in this band i tell you. dont hate. i'm single and allowed). a lot of fun. i think i was possibly the oldest one there but that aint gonna stop me. the singer reminded me so much of scott corgan i had to tell him. the resemblance was huge, to me. it was a sold out show, but thankfully i was hooked up which saved me from missing a good time. VIP PASS!

i took a few videos last night but here's a couple.

previous to that day a friend from hong kong came to visit. rainbow. it was so nice to see someone so familiar. it felt like home in london all of a sudden. she bought me dinner. how kind. i'm looking forward to going back to hong kong to visit. it's long over due. i need my family for a little bit, it's almost been a year. i mean seriousssly. that's too dang long to be away from people you love the most. makes you tough though. i'm learning i'm sensitive and its ok to be, when all along i thought i was a machine. people tell me how strong i am, so i guess i'm learning that too. yesterday a girl complimented me after i spoke at bible study saying how it's amazing how well i know myself. i guess you have to after moving around so much, you kind of just get on with it. my mouth hurts. did i mention that. i can't concentrate on much else. i sit everywhere holding my jaw hoping his healing hands will zap me better.

off to enjoy the rest of this cold day.

♥

sigh...

2009-02-03T15:04:00.001-08:00

mxpx give me butterflies. what's wrong with me.

♥

snow time!

2009-02-03T06:21:00.000-08:00

i've never experienced snow like this, so it's been really a lot of fun. it does make me miss snowboarding soo much. our shoes on the snow, crunching on the ground everywhere we go is a nice familiar sound! i've been waiting all morning for the mail man and he's still not here. AAAAAA.

back to playing guitar. all day everyday. four days till the bradley show. can't wait.

♥

[the real] mr and mrs smith.

2009-02-01T15:05:00.000-08:00

haven't been this tired in so long. feels good somehow. beautifully powerful wedding yesterday. disappointing, expensive, chaotic, busy tattoo convention this morning, followed up by a trip to the ocean with friends for fish and chips. possibly the coldest day of my life. i almost cried my hands were burning so much. it's snowing a lot right now, a new experience for me.. but i must say i'm really excited to crawl into my sleeping bag and not wake until i have to. wish i had my personal body heater with me. whaaaat.

by the way.... i really dont take friendship for granted. so thank YOU for being my friend.

this wedding (and my parents) remind me there is true love, it definitely is patient, not jealous, or proud. it does exist and i apologise if i've ever talked about marriage lightly. it's such a huge deal. the biggest commitment/decision you'll probably ever make in your life and this wedding re emphasized that for me.

God is wonderful! and so is my sleeping bag.

je suis fatigue.
bon nuit.

♥

life is good!

2009-01-30T13:25:00.000-08:00

being a professional bum. on my second dosage of antibiotics thanks to mike radfords awesome hot tub. i'm just thankful he's all better even if i'm not. spending a lot of time in cafes watching people go by whilst i drink hot chocolate. working on my resume and business cards, website and portfolio. catching up with old friends. playing guitar all day everyday. working on two songs. i like that heavy metalists like my songs and some guy at a show said "how can a girl that listens to metal play this stuff?" praising the Lord for guitars. seriously, so much of my release is on that wooden stringed thing. i've had the luxurious pleasure of borrowing a taylor lately. it just invites you to play. thankful my big brother is home after a gnarly motorbike incident. excited that God answers prayer. on sunday i'm going to a tattoo convention. monday something arrives for me in the mail. then the sixth the bradley hathaway show, then i fly to hong kong HALLELUJAHHH. seeing family for the first time in nine months is going to be unreal fun. they are my constant! such a great family it amazes me. we're all such strong individuals, i love it. i'm anxious to be around my parents and learn from them some more. they are so in love after so long, so wise. anyone will tell you the same.

the wedding of the year - tomorrow. my favourite little filipino cuddle core lover is getting married. i have a satin purple dress to wear to her wedding. quite excited by it. haha.

♥

i want!!

2009-01-29T14:05:00.001-08:00

the dolphin i hung out with in hawaii was the best experience of my life. i miss swimming with eva and watching her attend her baby dolphin every two minutes. sigh...

a comment i got on myspace today:
"ur wierd u want all kinds of animals.lol".

its true... as well as those i'd like a white lab. might start with that.

♥

apple trees.

2009-01-25T18:16:00.000-08:00

I've receive pictures from the Lord, often, but since being all over the place I’ve not steadied myself enough to be in that place of complete clarity again until recently. Everything is beginning to be impressive again, and a favourite of all; is birds. They sing so much, are in conversation, seem so contempt, and are the most beautiful, magnificent things ever. They soar for months, and seem to care for each other. Call me crazy, but I just seem to learn from them.

LOVE BIRDS!

Tonight I talked to God about pictures and how I love ‘waiting for the apples to fall from the trees’ and it was although he gave me a whole new meaning for that saying. It was like God was telling me, wait on him, his time is perfect. There’s such trust that comes with that. I learn so much in the waiting and yearning period, it's silly to rush that appreciation process. If we draw nearer to him, and he draws nearer to us. But if I’m there trying to shake the tree and pull the apples down before they are ready, I’m going to get a sour apple, or one with worms in. it was also brought to me if I am so late in getting my apples, they will all be spoiled and not perfect. Still available, and still edible, but just not the best I could have, but I do know he makes everything beautiful in His time, and can do whatever he wants with our nothingness. It was like, if I wait on his time, and receive his perfect will for me, I will get the most perfect crunchy, sweet tasting apple. I feel a bit nuts talking about apples and Jesus... but He knows me, and knows how much I like hanging out with him outdoors and alone, reflecting on the wonderful things He has made.

He is sovereign, I want to be obedient, why wouldn’t I want to be? Prayer. It’s such an amazing concept and reality, that you can be in direct communication with the creator of the universe, and I don’t really understand why I wouldn’t want to do that all the time. I want to deliver prayer in such a simple, yet sincere way. He is to be feared, He’s so personable, yet so worthy of such respect, reverence and praise. “And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” –matt six.

I hope I can be an encourager, a person that builds, not destroys. I want to be the best person in the world at caring for people.

Meet me at my house for a cup of apple juice :]

hello london!

2009-01-23T17:46:00.000-08:00

i enjoyed my romantic quiet time with Him here the other late night.

my most favourite german girl. my new bff. we've been in the making a long time, and finally get to hang out properly.

my new floor space where i sleep. my body is beginning to hurt. i think i can only sleep on hard floor for so long.

i ordered these two shirts, and love them, but they are gigantic. sad to see them go. i've been looking for a wolf tshirt for SO long. too good to be true.

just to make p&p worth it i got some "cheesy 80's shirt" in the words of ryan. whatever i'm totally cheesy eighties.

Jeremiah 29:10-12 (New International Version)

10 This is what the LORD says: "When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my gracious promise to bring you back to this place. 11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.

amen.

all my posts are going to be random for the next little bit. hope you're okay with that.

♥

impending doom

2009-01-22T17:57:00.001-08:00

www.myspace.com/impending

check out their new song. it willlll destroy you.

♥

come!

2009-01-19T17:30:00.000-08:00

bout time i started playing shows again i guess.. i found this on someones myspace page. i stole it.

fine in o nine.

2009-01-19T06:59:00.000-08:00

obviously not doing this blogging stuff too well right now.
everything is fine in o'nine, moved to london. had an interview with mac cosmetics. waiting for call back to have another. fell in love, just to tell myself to fall back out. i dream of beauty in north carolina. my sleepy soul needs reviving by the blood of Jesus. last night we sang amazing grace with just voices, and it was powerful as echos bounced off the cold, old, stone walls as people flooded out the door. london is great. it's amazing to see this place differently and how cultures work. sincerity is definitely here. it's good to be independent again. i feel myself growing up. i cant wait to be a mother, but i was beyond blessed to hold bayley, a beautiful human being for two hours, and to feed her. it scares me how people can fall in and out of love so easily. i don't understand. God, who am i to call the shots? God how much longer of this pretending to be strong? you are my constant song. i'm in a new band that i'm excited about. i'm addicted to watching john mayer live in la; what a great dvd i got for christmas. i'm supporting bradley hathaway soon, hes playing a show out here. i live with boys that ride motorbikes that i'm building the courage up to get on the back of. bands are touring here soon which i love. i'm excited to see those friends again. apparently i like stinky dirty metal boys that don't ever wash? just tim lambesis. aha! my urgent care crisis is still apparent but is going down. i missed a tattoo appointment to drive with carmen to vegas. i'm realising intimately, i am under grace. wow big mess of ramble ramble.

heres one of the shots i did of bayley the babe.

♥

poorly

2008-12-26T20:31:00.000-08:00

unfortunately experienced americas urgent care system for the first time today. bummed.

♥

he is faithful.

2008-12-22T01:26:00.000-08:00

april and her mum prepared a kick ass breakfast yesterday morning which made me miss home. tommie gave me a christmas present that i cant wait to wear since i picked it out - it has something to do with freakin as i lay dying! i have a package waiting for me from ash!). jakes mum handed me treats and a bag with a blanket she made me. gee, you guys are so good. yesterday celebrated danos birthday. had awesome tattoo conversation. for some reason its a subject that really interests me. i had one of mikes mums cupcakes yesterday and they were soo good oh my gosh! tonight we are baking more. i'm super stoked to go jump into the jahhcoozie right now! i have so many dang photos. i'll show you some one day. i'm barely around the internet now so my posts are sporadic and photos even more so.

ok, most importantly my reason to blog this time, the Lord rewards the faithful, and i've never experienced it so strongly till this past weekend. he is so true to his promises even if you can't see them because i promise you one day you will, and it will appear in ways you probably never imagined. well, thats what happened to me. it's the most comforting feeling having the most powerful yet loving God be your everything. his peace is so deep and truly seems to nourish all situations with grace.

id like.

2008-12-18T21:07:00.000-08:00

i’d like to think forgiveness is more rewarding for the forgiver. id like to think i’m not as cheap as i feel. I’d like to think newport beach will one day be my back garden. i’d like to think I wont cry at all the way back home. id like to think ill get married to someone i want to be. i’d like to think Jesus knows me. i’d like to think he will put jewels in my crown and tattoo his arm with my name. i’d like to think everything works out in the end. i’d like to think you’d love english tea to compliment your american heart. i’d like to think i am loyal like the morning.

scored matt and robert in the photobooth i love.

:tomorrow: final, interview, handing in papers, last day of school, website release, last sleep in burr!bank.
♥

i'm so distracted by this movie my roomies are watching and i have papers to do. dangit.

everything is better after dark.

friends

2008-12-14T09:30:00.000-08:00

are good.

hello la.

three friends got tattooed in the same day. all at different places. felt like i was missing out or something. just kidding. kelsey tattooed herself too. brutal. i've been to san diego once for sounds of the underground, but this time it was good to walk around and see it a little bit. i really enjoyed it. everything seemed so cute even if half the people i saw were on drugs. i want to be in san diego today.

some famous hot dog place thats been around for years. i couldnt believe the line, even at night time!

we found what matthew was looking for.

burbank photoshoots are fun. sample sample.

good times. seriously blessed. i'm beginning to believe there is good in everything. one week left of school, its going to drag on and on. school is so intense, but rewarding. i'll be relieved when it's over. time to get out into the real world and make my future, i think. i've been encouraged to do music since being here which has inspired me to write more. i've been playing so much. its been good company. i got woken up by a phone call from hong kong at sevenish. i love when people call when you've asked them to. i've been hungry since yesterday. maybe i should do something about it. nap time first.

♥

bayley.

2008-12-07T19:45:00.000-08:00

so much to celebrate! but hello!!!!! look at this beauty!

bayley you are beautiful!!! the most perfect baby. absolutely incredible. i cannot wait to be a mother, baby maker hurry!!! congratulations to brandon and alysa. life is so amazing. so proud of them, they are the most wonderful parents. it was the best thing to hear after church today.

hollywood somewhere. trees make everything pretty.
.

love this lady. shes encouraging to be around, and so funny. she got a new tattoo yesterday. guess which.

♥

bazan.

2008-12-06T13:40:00.001-08:00

pratically watch this everyday.